On Surviving Beautiful Hearts, Part III

Part Three answering the question about our right to pursue happiness. Dear Auntie SAM: Hello Auntie! I just had a thought, sort of an idea for one of your articles in your new blog. It is generally about downshifting and a human’s right not to be successful all the time but to focus more on […]

"Make mine sarsparilly!" -- Calamity Jane

Part Three answering the question about our right to pursue happiness.

Dear Auntie SAM: Hello Auntie! I just had a thought, sort of an idea for one of your articles in your new blog. It is generally about downshifting and a human’s right not to be successful all the time but to focus more on something what makes him really happy. In any case, all the best, and see you some day! ??

Who knows what happened in real life, but to hear her say it, Calamity Jane set off by herself at fifteen years old. According to census bureau information, she was likely only eleven. But it was her life; let’s let it be her story.

Dressed as a boy, she joined the calvary. Specifically, she joined an expedition team designed to take oil lands away from the Sioux. She also worked as a scout, a prostitute, & a dancehall girl. But, mostly, her image as a frontierswoman – her chutzpah – sold the American Dream: that anyone could set out for their fortune & make it true.

At least that’s what the dream sold before it became corporate.  

Economics says America is the land of free markets. Capitalism thrives because reasonable people make reasonable choices. And if a person sees opportunity elsewhere, they will move to that opportunity. Yet, as one strives through this market, one collects: a mortgage, investments, corporate & social capital, relationships, obligations, etc, etc, etc … Things that tie one to a job, to a place, to people. Eventually, it feels like a market, but it does not feel free.

We downsized when we came to Switzerland. No mortgage. No debt. We wanted to live as freely as possible. And, in many ways, financially, that’s easy here. The American Dream isn’t sold here. So, middle class families often do not purchase homes, own cars, & refi both to pay for their children’s education. Apartments are nice places to raises families. Public transportation & bicycling work for most. And education is, comparatively, nearly free.  

Many consumer things, by my American perspective, are expensive. But the cost accounts for much of the actual production & service price. So, over-consumption is not common; most people buy only what they actually value.

In these ways, an economist would be pleased.

But, for English-only speakers, moving to a city where there is one industry is signing up for a very unique yet unexciting form of bondage.

One day, in the States, I found myself in a new city selling perfume door to door. I walked by a bar & thought anyone in there should bring their wife home something pretty. So I sold a few bottles to drunks & was offered a better paying job scrubbing used appliances. I took it. After a time speant cleaning the messiest ovens I’ve ever seen, the owner introduced me to his friend: a man who hired me to manage his insurance agency.

When I came to Basel with a professional degree & experience, I thought getting a job would be easy. It took me four years to find work that will support myself. During that time, my husband twisted & turned for Big Pharma.   

Eventually, we all want to leave the corporate world. Set it all on fire & walk away.

I applaud us for that. And I’ll bring the matches.

But recognize this: it’s one thing to set off without any wherewithall in a country where you have all rights to live. It’s another thing to come to Basel.

Yet. You can take Calamity Jane out of America, but America will always remain.

So, what precisely are we meant to do in this complex, complicit society in which we each quest for happiness — sometimes, at each other’s peril — & sometimes without much wherewithall at all?

Say Yes.

Pursue your passions. Define success on your own terms. Be fearless. Or, even truer: fear like you’ve never done before. But still do it. Follow what makes your heart sing.  

We’ll toast marshmallows at the end.

XO

AS

__

One hundred and twelve years ago, CALAMITY JANE died on August 1st. And seven hudred and twenty four years ago, you were born, SWITZERLAND! (We’ll forget the numbers now, but me too.) So, this weekend, PARTY LIKE ITS OUR BIRTHDAY. FIREWORKS, CERVELAS, & BEER. YUM. 

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